“I have a rare Where’s Waldo book with no Waldo in it. It must be a misprint. Is this valuable?”
“It’s in pretty good condition except the front and back covers have come off.”
“I have an old Christmas Carol signed ‘your friend, Charles Dickens.’ It’s from 1906.”
“Can you give me a list of all the books you don’t want to buy?”
Duttenhofer's Books 
These remind me of one of the things that happened at the antique mall when I was working. A woman called who said she had some really old books to sell. I don’t remember what they were, but they were all oft reprinted classics. She insisted that they were so old that at least some of them had to be first editions, and they all must be quite valuable. I asked her to look for the date on one of the oldest ones. There was a pause while she struggled with the book and the phone at the same time, and then she told me “1951”. I told her that that wasn’t really very old, especially for the kind of classic titles she had. Then her reply:
“1951 seems old to me…when did they start making books?”
Not on book values but four true stories nonetheless from B. Dalton’s in the 80s
“What kind of book would a man like?”
“What kind of man?”
“I don’t know! Don’t you have a men’s section?!”
“I need a book that will teach my grandson to read.”
“You mean a parent’s guide or audio aide?”
“No, I just want a book that will teach him to read!”
2 from manager #6:
Picking up the latest Bobby Kennedy bio: “Now, which of these guys was President?”
“Will you come over here and tell this idiot we did not fight the Germans in World War II?”
Memories light the corners of my mind. I have an original 1973 45 RPM recording of this song with only light scratches and fingerprints. I would like $500 for it.